Brownie
by Dbz VD rox
Summary: The DBZ guys make brownies, but bad things happen!
1. Chapter 1

**Brownie**

**My first comedy fic. Enjoy!! This fic was inspired by a linkin park fic I read called "Brownie" **

Chapter 1

Vegeta's POV.

Kakarrot and his dumb friends decided that it would be a good idea to have a Brownie-making contest. Too bad everyone forgot that Kakarrot can't cook even if his life depended on it.

"Kakarrot, what the hell is that?" I asked while staring at his so-called-brownies that looked like vomit. Also, everyone else seemed to be staring at them to.

"What are you talking about? It's brownies!" exclaimed Kakarrot as he looked at all of us like we were stupid for asking such a question.

"Well, Goku. None of our brownies look like _that." said _Trunks as he was holding his own brownies that looked WAY better then Kakarrots.

"But I followed the instructions!" protested Kakarrot.

"Kakarrot, you can't even figure out how to use a computer! What makes you think that you could cook!" I snapped at him, his stupidity getting to me.

Kakarrot was about to say something else when Trunks interrupted. "Guys, I think we have a problem." he pointed to Kakarrot's "brownies" and it looked like they were going to explode. Why, you ask? Well, maybe its because of the yellow liquid seeping out of the sides and the way it's rising so fast?!

"EVERYONE GET DOWN!!!" yelled Kakarrot's oldest spawn, Gohan.

Quickly, we all obeyed, diving underneath tables or couches to get safe. Once we dared to open our eyes, the first thing I saw was that the yellow liquid that was seeping out of the "thing" that Kakarrot had made was covering all of the brownies that we made. Even my perfect ones were destroyed. Furious, I made my way over to Kakrot who was cowering under the table. "Look what you did!!!" I screamed in his face, "because of you, my _perfect_ brownies are destroyed!!"

Just as I was about to pound the living daylights out the mother of all idiots, Goten let out a VERY girly scream.

"Now what!!" I yelled over to Kakarrot's spawn who had fear in his eyes.

"I-I t-think w-we have a problem." stuttered Goten who pointed to the brownies.

Mumbling curse words under my breath about how cowardly that spawn of Kakarrot is, I made my way over to the brownies that were mine and looked at it.

But, what happened next caught me completely off guard. "What the hell are you looking at?" _it_ said.

I just started at my brownies in shock. Brownies couldn't talk. Could they? No. I was just imagining it. I looked over my shoulder to see Goten staring at me. "Did those brownies just talk to you, Vegeta?"

Great, now the kid is messed up. "Of course not!!" I yelled, "BROWNIES CAN'T TALK!!!"

Then as if on cue, Trunk's brownies proved me wrong. "Of course we can talk, do you have shit in your ears or something? Porcupine haired freak."

That's it. I was mad. No, mad is the wrong word. Try furious as I made my way over to Trunk's brownies to give them a piece of my mind. Just as I was about to send these brownies to Hell and back, Kakarrot stopped me. "Wait, Vegeta! Don't do it!"

I turned to look at him in disbelief as the ki ball in my hand disappeared. Then I remembered that HE was the cause of all this. "Why should I stop?" I asked him with a deadly voice that would've made Frieza piss himself.

The idiot replied, "Because, these brownies are helpless and defenseless. It would be wrong to attack them. Besides, look at them."

I growled deep in my throat, not liking this one bit, but I stole a glance at all the brownies and smirked a little. Mine, out of everyone's else's , were perfect because they looked like me. Goten's brownies looked nothing like him, in fact, they were covered in feathers! Gohan's, on the other hand, looked like a book! Disgusted, I looked over to where my son's brownies were. They looked ok, compared to the others.

I then turned my attention back to Kakarrot, who was watching his sons playing with the brownies. How do you "play" with a brownie? I will never know. Getting a little ticked that the idiot was still watching his kids and not noticing that I wanted to talk to him, I cleared my throat, which got his attention and began speaking. "Fine, you can keep the pile of crap. Just don't come crying to me when one of your sons is eaten by the _thing!_"

"OK, I won't-." suddenly, _It interrupted _Kakarrot.

"Who are you calling crap? I'm a brownie, not a pile of crap. I think that spiky hair of yours is messing with your intelligence." My son's brownies said.

"Maybe he had none to began with." came the response of Goten's brownies.

That was IT!!! "Goten, Trunks." I said in a very small and deadly voice, "if you want your brownies to live to see tomorrow, then I suggest you get out of here."

Trunks and that idiot Goten grabbed their brownies and fled the house like a bat out of hell.

TBC!


	2. Chapter 2

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Hey, everyone!! I'm back with a new update on Brownie!! And for all of those who reviewed, thank you!! This chapter is dedicated to all my reviewers!! Enjoy!! This is still in Vegeta's POV.

Chapter 2

My life could not get any worse then it already is.First, that blasted woman had to go on a business trip, leaving me with Trunks and his abomination. If that wasn't bad enough, the brat just _had_ to invite that idiot of Kakarrot's to stay with him the whole week that the woman would be gone, and worse of all, he brought his pile of talking shit with him.

Just as I was about to go train to release some steam that I had built up, the brat came up to me with _It_ in his hands. "What do you want?" I asked dangerously, pissed off that I not only had to baby-sit them for a week, but also, their pile of shit to.

"I was wondering if you could make Goten and I something to eat." Trunks said.

I smirked. "Well, why don't you eat those brownies? They look good enough to eat." I hoped to kami that the boy came to his senses and just eat, or better yet, burn the darn thing.

But, just as I expected, kami has something against me because the next thing that I heard was, "Are you insane? I would _never_ do anything to harm my brownies!" Trunks suddenly had an evil grin on his face. "I'll just wait until mom gets home and then I can explain to her why Goten and I are on the verge of death."

Damn. That boy is good. If I let them starve, then I'll never hear the end of it from Bulma. "FINE!! I'll make you and that brat something to eat!"

Trunks smiled. "Thanks, dad. I'm gonna go and put Fudge upstairs."

I just stared at him in shock. Did he just call that thing "Fudge?"

"Wait a minute." I said to my son that stopped in his tracks and stared at me.

"What, dad."

"Why did you call that thing Fudge?" I asked him.

Trunks replied, "Because that's his name. Goten called his fluffy."

I groaned. Great, now they're naming them. I would never name mine. In fact, I gave mine to Kakarrot because I didn't want mine.

As I was walking into the kitchen, I saw Goten sitting at the table with his disgusting brownies. "Hey, look! Its porcupine haired freak!" I heard the abomination say.

Goten turned around and said, "Hey, Vegeta! Are you gonna make us something to eat?"

"I don't think vegetable head can cook." replied the abomination.

I had to close my eyes and count to 10 in order to clam myself, but it didn't work. "Goten." I said in a very small and pressed voice, "Take that _thing _upstairs, NOW!!"

Goten winced at the highness of my voice and I thought kami was going to give me a break. Oh, how wrong I was. "But Fluffy wants to stay down here! He doesn't want to go upstairs!!" whined Goten in that annoying voice of his.

I glared draggers. "I don't care what that pile of crap wants! TAKE IT UPSTAIRS NOW!!"

Goten was about to say something else when, "Hey, dad! Is our food ready yet?!"

I turned my head and saw Trunks standing in the kitchen doorway with that blasted brownie! "I thought you were going to put it upstairs!"

Trunks just grinned that evil grin. No doubt he inherited the grin from me. "I changed my mind. Besides, Fudge will be all alone up there."

I cursed kami for putting me through this torture and then, turned towards the two little demons and their blasted brownies from hell. "Fine! But, if those brownies do something that I don't approve of or like for that matter, then, their going to have a meet and greet with King Yemma VERY soon!"

The two boys nodded in understanding, or so I thought. "Good. Now, I'm going to make you peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and you better eat it!" I said, not liking the fact that me, the prince of all sayians, has be reduced to a common housewife!

As I got to work, I didn't see the evil smile on Goten's face, nor did I see his brownie fly off and go upstairs….

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Review!! More to come!!


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